Gratitude in Crisis
It’s been a whirlwind of emotions the last few weeks. I started in the hospital when our cases were starting to creep up.
The crazy dreams.
The crazy dreams.
The decontamination process.
The week I was on Hospitalist, I signed 3 death certificates (nonCovid) and I sent 2 patients to ICU (1 Covid). Needless to say, I came home every night feeling sad and powerless, knowing this Covid19 beast has us pretty defenseless.
We are trying some therapies but nothing is showing dramatic or rapid improvement enough to gain FDA approval.
The patient I sent to ICU stayed there for over two weeks and finally was released. I had a telephone follow-up appointment with her. She was extremely thankful to me and the rest of the hospital staff. She choked up and started crying and naturally I started crying too. Relieved she lived to tell the tale. Scared for how many will not make it. Grateful to be appreciated.
As we settle in to the new “normal,” I realize that I cannot control Coronavirus. I cannot control what the government does or doesn’t do. I cannot control the people who want to mingle around in public or open businesses up early.
What I can control is who I am during this crisis. I can control what I want to take away from this. I can figure out how to adjust my purpose so I can continue to serve my community.
Aren’t you seeing immense kindness and humanity surfacing from this crisis? I certainly am, and I cannot express the depth of my gratitude.
So on the tails of the emotional OneWorld concert, I am grateful for a somewhat “simple” life with less distractions. I am grateful for all the FaceTimes and Zooms with family and friends. It means more than you know. I’m grateful to the patients and community who are finally realizing that most physicians truly give their blood, sweat and tears to our craft and our patients.
Please continue staying home and staying safe.